Because it is an under-served niche in size fantasy, I’ve recently been combing through my size smut collection to find M/f content to post on Daddy’s Dollhouse. It’s really driven home something that I’ve long been aware of but could always use revisiting, especially given the transient nature of the size “community.” I want to talk about the role of the (straight) male gaze in size porn.
Size porn is like any other kind of porn in that it contains the presumption that its audience is mainly straight men. The primary consequence of this is that the vast majority of imagery (and text) focuses on women, usually with an idealized body type. In M/f smut, this means a lot of handheld naked cuties. A lot.
The good news is that this is changing, although perhaps not as fast as one might like. The internet is old enough now that a couple of generations (of all genders and orientations) have grown up with ready access to porn and thus have had the opportunity to develop their own tastes in porn and even start to demand and create alternatives.
I never met Larry Philby, never communicated with him, never really saw much of his art. What I know of him is solely due to SizeCon. He figured largely in many after-action reports, a generous spirit full of stories that made everyone feel accepted. It seems he found his own personal size community well before the internet made it much easier, which still gobsmacks me to think about. Seeing photos of him sharing his art made me chagrined that I ever thought a size get-together was beneath me.
Why do we share our size fantasies with others, and why do we care what others enjoy in size fantasy? I suppose everything on this blog is an attempt to answer one or both of these questions, but a couple of recent posts have me looking at them with renewed urgency. Aborigen asked himself what he still hopes to achieve with his size writing, and in one of those recurring “What would you really do?” threads on the Shrunken Women Board Azureeyes talked about the importance of hearing about the real people behind the fantasy. I’ve been watching the online size scene for 25 years and an active participant for almost a decade and I still don’t know exactly why I keep returning to it.
I haven’t done nearly enough reading to have a full understanding of the history of sex work and the roles it has played in various societies over the millennia, and I would be very grateful for reading recommendations in the comments. In the meantime, I would like to discuss current attitudes and practices regarding sex work as they apply to the size fantasy community. Specifically, I would like to examine what is okay and not okay when approaching creators and others and how to calibrate one’s expectations. This is very obviously a discussion in process, and I am open to being corrected, clarified, and educated. Please respond with your thoughts below.
I bring all this up because when you tell someone how they should participate in the size community (create certain content, play certain roles), you are demanding that they perform sex work for your gratification.
One of the reasons that Jitensha was motivated to create Daddy’s Dollhouse was that, in her experience, some M/f fans were inhibited from expressing their darker fantasies, more so than fans of other size fantasy configurations. One of her first posts was an invitation for everyone to share the darker stuff that gets them going. It has been supremely gratifying to read and contribute to this thread.
Be warned: The discussion contains fatal outcomes, watersports, scat, cruelty, and of course nonconsensual encounters. Please read and comply with the forum rules.
To continue my (our?) discussion of a Size Aesthetic, I want to talk about how authors imagine their readership and how readers encounter narratives. Specifically, how much do authors predetermine “the” perspective of a story and how much do readers accept, reject, or negotiate those determinations. I also want to discuss the asymmetric nature of dom/sub fantasies and how much consideration we give to authors/readers “on the other end of” such fantasies. Finally, I want to interrogate how the tropes and expectations of size fantasy culture play into (and against) these considerations.
This the most hilarious and inspired tweet from Omnishambles. If you can’t see the image, here’s the text:
Hello everybody! I’m new to this chat
And so, to begin with, I’d like to say that
It really is crazy, if you stop to think
How all of us guys hope that one day we’ll shrink.
Wait, what, you like growth? Sorry, that I’m not getting.
I’d sooner be shrunk in an intimate setting
Her one and her only, being her toy alone
That seems pretty optimal. Each to their own!
What’s that? You’re a female? Neato, I guess.
(I cower at the sight of the cruel giantess.)
How mighty you look when you rise up and then
Take revenge upon all of the scared tiny men!
Beg pardon? There’s women down there too, you say?
Oh. Sorry, I should have suspected you’re gay.
It’s just that in my mind, the women I meet
All want to smear little guys under their feet.
You’ve got to be joking – you’re not into vore?
Then what are you even signed up in here for?
Can you even prove that you’re really a chick?
I didn’t come here just to moisten your dick.
So– oh. Oh, you’ve blocked me. That’s terribly rude
But what do I care, ’cause you’re clearly a dude.
This place is a graveyard. By why must it be?
That there’s no-one as into the fetish as me?
The un-self-conscious entitlement of far too many size roleplayers that Ominshambles deservedly skewers here is very simple to remedy: remember that your preferences are not universal, and everyone deserves to have their own desires accommodated and respected. Always ask before presuming what people are into, and graciously desist when there is no explicitly-given consent to proceed. If not everyone’s having a good time, what’s the point?
This thread on Aborigen‘s Twitter conflates a number of issues that have been concerning me off and on ever since I started writing size smut for publication. I’m going to lay out my current thinking on these and related topics, and as always, I am speaking only for myself, and I invite comments, questions, rebuttals, and other opinions in the replies.
The most immediate concern is that of objectification, which is not of course restricted to size smut (although there is a size-related pitfall, more on this later). The reason why objectification is, well, objectionable is that it treats the object of desire as just that, an object rather than a whole person with a history, desires, and agency of their own. This does not mean—as I believed in my misspent youth—that attraction to someone’s appearance is inherently objectifying or degrading.
A related phenomenon is fetishization, an intense attraction to or obsession with a specific characteristic or activity that assumes a greater importance than respecting the person possessing that characteristic or engaging in that activity. Indulging a fetish is to constantly risk losing sight of everything and everyone else. Being on the receiving end of fetishistic attention is a hollow experience at best.
These are examples of harmful conduct between real people in real life. Is art that invokes such conduct involving fictional people also harmful? Does porn have a greater or lesser responsibility than art to minimize harm?