We’re coming up on four years since Tumblwintr, and the world is getting yet another demonstration why it’s a bad idea to let billionaires exercise their sociopathy by controlling critical infrastructure. The crazy thing is, Musk isn’t even trying to ban porn on Twitter (yet). If grownups ever regain control of what’s left of Twitter, however, advertisers are going to demand they severely restrict or ban porn. It’s inevitable.
Elle Largesse (aka MightyTinyGiant), among others, is exploring the possibility of creating (and running?) a Mastodon server for hosting size fans. Unlike Twitter posts, Mastodon posts can be added to a RSS feed that can be aggregated by apps like Feedly. Presumably, this server will both allow NSFW content as well as moderating against harassment and hate speech. Here’s a form where you can sign up to be notified if/when they get it operational. I will also update this post with the URL if I learn about it.
For myself, I’m going (mostly) in the opposite direction. As a matter of cognitive load management, I need to severely restrict the amount of time I spend online. It’s a fiendish addiction in my experience, exacerbated by continuously calamitous current events. I want to read fewer posts and more books, and I’m trying to establish a daily habit of journaling (which will not be posted online).
I will continue to write size stories (although probably not any more quickly than my previous glacial pace), and this blog will still be a repository for sizey thoughts, essays, and digressions. After Tumblwintr I bookmarked the Twitter feeds (this is one way of thwarting The Algorithm, btw) of the size people I used to follow on Tumblr, and it seems you can do something similar with Mastodon, so I will retain the ability to lurk in a few size discussions. It’s hard to quit you.
I’ve been slowly reducing the number of online size venues that I visit on a regular basis, primarily because I’m getting diminishing returns on satisfactory content, but also because I’m becoming more aware of (and dismayed by) the amount of time I spend online. I’ve resolved that going forward the only places for my regular visits will be Daddy’s Dollhouse and DeviantArt. Both those sites allow anyone with an account to send me private messages. You can also reach me through this blog; all you need to provide is an email address.
As to my size stories, I’ve come to a couple of decisions about my ambitions. First, I’m not going to try to mold every one of my personal size fantasies into a story for publication. I might write some of them down as an exercise, but the simple fact is not all of them work as satisfactory stories. I have published pieces that are less stories than encounters, and I’m not abandoning that form. I’m just going to try to direct my energies toward more character-driven works.
It’s been ten years since I first resolved to write a size story for publication. I’ve thought and posted a lot about what I hoped to achieve with that story, and how those goals have evolved as it was received and I wrote more stories. If my first fifteen years of lurking in the online size scene was about finding validation for having size fantasies at all, then choosing to share my voice through my stories was about seeking recognition for my size fantasies in particular.
Those goals have been achieved. I am now roundly satisfied that a distinct fraction of size fantasists get off to the same precise elements and aspects of size fantasy that I get off to, and they seem to appreciate my efforts at writing about them. By cosmic grace, some of those fellow pervs seem to be actual women. That there are at least a few women out there who want to use me in the same way that I want to be used by them is an abiding comfort.
Despite this connection and this absolution, however, I remain fascinated with the possibility of a crossover story, a mainstream story that “incidentally” provokes consideration of sizey sexytimes. The majority of size content (and almost all of the special effects money and talent) is aimed at mainstream audiences. We all grew up being secretly excited by mainstream size content (often intended as children’s entertainment), and some of us even imprinted on it. We enjoyed it despite its lack of lascivious intent.
By contrast, most size porn by size pervs for size pervs seems to over-correct, leaning too hard into pandering to rather brazen (and not even appreciable by all size pervs) tropes. These tropes can be fun to deconstruct, but it doesn’t take long to find them tedious. Nothing is more dispiriting in size porn (or any other porn) than having it shoved in your face that the characters or performers are going through the motions of your particular fantasy just because they’re working from a script.
This is why I prefer to read and to write stories that don’t presume an audience primarily composed of size pervs. Not only is it more challenging to construct a scenario where mainstream characters plausibly find themselves in a size encounter, I continue to entertain the conceit that, when well-executed, such content might help introduce newbies to size fantasy. After all these years, this remains my lodestar when writing size fantasy: to craft a smutty size encounter that could appeal to someone who never thought of it that way before.
I don’t even really need evidence or proof of this conceit. It’s not even as if I think size fantasy is some obscure enthusiasm that needs proselytization to spread. It’s more of a challenge to my own writing skills, to take what I find appealing and make it relatable. The aspiration itself is sufficient to push me to write.
So that is what I’m spending my discretionary time and energy on these days. It’s a recapturing and a refocusing of my attentions, which have been widely scattered in recent years. I don’t plan to lose sight of any of you, wherever you get off to. Without you, I would never have written a thing.
El Amante Menguante 